Thursday, August 12, 2010

Reasons to live

Suicide ideation has always been my main problem. I had an epiphany the other day. I am part of a family, and right now, in the oldest generation, hence, am counted upon to keep up my end of the "Family" commitment. I simply cannot commit suicide as I am needed to maintain this families' balance. So there. Think of a table with four legs, suddenly losing one. The other observation is that I just turned 60 and am still here.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Tiny book, big help

In the arena of self-help and cognitive therapy this is the story of the tiny book. I found this tiny notebook in the street just after a light rain. It is 2 x 3.5 inches—business card size. For a long time it sat on my desk, unopened. Then one day, Little Red Riding Hood....oops, wrong story. Anyway, I started writing insights when they occurred to me. I filled the book after a while and started on the backs of the filled pages. When things are tough, or even when they aren't I go back to the tiny book for some insight. The randomness of just opening it now and then adds to the therapeutic effect. It has 50 pages or so, so there is variety as I thumb through it. Also, having entries at different times, with varying moods, also enhances the effectiveness. If things are really dark, I can read the whole thing.